As I sit here, I think about...where is everybody??? I have been there for some many over the course of my lifetime. And now that I am unable to do as I use too, or even call as much as I did, I realize, no one is checking in on me. Well, I shouldn't say no one, there are a few, and that number is very small. But, it seems when you could really need help, people disappear, but why is that?
There has been many that have told me, "if you need me for anything, just call me". Well, I called and I'm tired of leaving voice messages, with no returned calls. It's getting to the point, I don't leave messages anymore. The unnerving part is, people have let me down countless times, over the course of my life. I always have to do things on my own all the time.
My father taught me, let me rephrase that, my father made to be independent, and this cause me to have little faith in men. Guess what? Yes, men have let me down as well. Not that I was waiting for them too, but they showed it in so many ways. Now, I was told this scripture is in the middle of the Bible, "It is better to trust in the Lord than to put confidence in man." Ps.118.8 (of course some say others). Regardless, I have learned that man (men and women) will let you down, and that means family too.
Us caregivers, need care too. Recently, while meeting with the director of a care facility, she and I got a chance to speak alone and the first thing she said was, "how are you holding up?". I wanted to break down and cry. Most just ask how mom's doing, but never ask how am I doing in the conversation, or it is at the end of it.
People need to realize, that there is always someone going through too with those who are ill, especially when it is serious. We want to have a little faith in people, to show some compassion. But until it happen and during, I got to put my trust in God more each and every day!
Nothing like a mother's love...
Been there, you're doing a good job, but it doesn't feel like it when you can't depend on anyone
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